Ach! Make it Stop! Oh, the Pain! Oh, the Pain! Arggh! Gzzrvkeobleplat!

Sorry, crimestoppers, that it has been so long since I posted. I've been swamped both at work and at home, but with the holiday weekend, I have a few minutes to ruminate on the Indians.

When last we left the Indians, they were on a bit of a win streak, and, in fact, about to sweep the A's at home and move into first place in the AL Central.

Then they went to Cincinnati and got swept by the Reds. They got swept by the *&%#@$% Reds. They moved out of first place in the AL Central.

Then they went to Chicago and got swept by the White Sox. They got swept by the !#@$%!$% White Sox. They moved further out of first place in the AL Central.

Then they came home, and now they've just lost a series to the Texas Rangers. The !#$%@!$#% Rangers! But, at least, they were not swept.

The conclusion I've come to after some rumination: The Indians, as they are currently composed, are not very good. They're still wasting some of the best starting pitching performances in the majors this year. However, most of the team is not hitting their weight. Have they stopped listening to their coaches? Are they all trying to press too hard? Are their butts all so tight that they can't play ball? What the hell is going on? This team has too much talent to be playing crappy ball like this. At what point does the pitching staff go into Wedge's office and demand to hit? It's really starting to look like a death spiral.

Also since we last spoke:

• He Who Shall Not be Named is back, and actually closed the Indians' most recent win.
• Fausto Carmona is now on the DL. Fortunately, Jake Westbrook will likely be back next week.
• Ben Francisco is hitting like an MVP, but made an inexplicable fielding error to give the Rangers the winning run this afternoon. (Congratulations, Ben! You've finally passed the initiation! You're officially a 2008 Cleveland Indian!)
• Jensen Lewis is now in Buffalo
• Craig Breslow has been DFA'd. If we're lucky, he'll clear waivers and we'll be able to stash him in Buffalo.
• Ed Mujica is back. So is Scott Elarton, who will be the long man the Indians have not had this year.
• David Delucci's batting average has decreased from .245 to .217. Shin Soo Choo, meanwhile, continues to rehab in Buffalo, and his rehab clock is rapidly winding down to decision time. Are we seeing the last of the Looch?

Andy Marte Watch

Since my last post, Andy Marte has played once. In the Oakland series. He has not played since May 15. Since Andy Marte played last:

• Michael Aubrey has been called up. Since May 17, he has 16 at bats, including 2 home runs and is batting .250. Andy Marte, since the beginning of the season, has 26 at bats in 12 games.
• Casey Blake has 5 hits in 27 at bats, for an average of .185. He started this stretch batting .219. His average has dropped to .213.

Mojo Watch:

I don't know why the hell I still bother with this.

Starting pitching staff:

Ben Francisco:

Everyone else not on the starting staff or not named Ben Francisco: