I have to admit that I was conflicted going into the game on who to root for. Really, for the most part, both cities (Boston and New York) and their fan bases are pretty much insufferable, especially for those of us here in "Flyover Territory." Do I root for the Patriots, the bullies of the NFL with their cheating head coach and their tendency to run the score up mercilessly on weaker teams? Or, do I put aside my dislike for Eli Manning and New York fans in general and root for the plucky underdog Giants?
Before I go further, I must declare that I believe Eli Manning to be a Punk. A special kind of Punk, to be precise - a Punk who believes himself bigger than the game. It's a class of Punkitude that lumps him in a group that includes John Elway, JD Drew and Kobe Bryant. You are a punk if, coming out of high school or college, you refuse to play for the team who drafted you because you feel that they are not deserving of your talents:
- Elway played baseball (not very well, I might add), in order to avoid having to play for the Colts.
- Drew refused to sign with the Phillies, instead playing in one of the independent leagues.
- Bryant, well, as a 17-year-old high schooler (high schooler!) declared that his game was so huge that he would only sign with a team from New York or Los Angeles, and to prove his point, held out and forced the Charlotte Hornets to trade him to the Lakers.
Manning, as is well known, refused to play for San Diego, the team which picked him, and pretty much forced them to trade him to New York. This has led me to seriously question his judgment - you're a 21-year-old kid, and you don't want to be the toast of San Diego, make millions of dollars and live year-round where the weather is great and you can party on the beach in the offseason and hand the ball off to LaDainian Tomlinson? You'd rather face the New York media every day? Dude?
So, Manning is a Punk who believes himself bigger than the game. It's hard for me to root for teams led by Punks. And, really, who doesn't want to see the annoying loudmouths from the '72 Dolphins silenced? So, going into the game, I bit the bullet and started the game rooting for the New England Patriots to make history, but not very hard.
As the Giants continued to keep Brady and The Incredible Hulk of Sulk (Randy Moss) in check, forcing him to make bad decision after bad decision, I started to believe that the Giants could actually do it. More importantly, I began to want them to do it. And when Tyree made that amazing catch, I knew that it was over - the Giants were going to be this year's Team O'Destiny.
Despite my personal dislike for Manning's Punkitude, I have to admit that I'm feeling okay with watching the Patriots fall hard, simply because it takes Boston sports and their insufferable fans down a notch. Really, the only people who don't like watching a bully get what's coming to him are the bully and his mother.
And, really what could be more indicative of the Patriots' true colors than Bill Belicheat (see picture below) leaving the sidelines with time left on the clock?
And, in an exclusive scoop, I got a picture of the New England offensive line after the game:
I have to admit to some schadenfreude in watching the New England Patriots fan express their post-game sorrow and pain. Hey, guys and gals, you don't know pain and sorrow and despair. Try being a Cleveland fan for any length of time. I've got a quarter for you to call someone who cares.
And, I have to admit, I'm happy for my Uncle Marc in Hartford, Connecticut, who is a lifelong Giants fan and has been on the waiting list for season tickets for 20 years, and still isn't very close to getting them.
Commercials: generally pretty disappointing. The clear winner was the FedEx commercial with the giant carrier pigeons.
At Pronk Needs You!, we have established the Elvis-based mojo scale as a way to measure observable trends, inspired by the classic hit song by Mojo Nixon and Skid Roper, "Elvis is Everywhere."
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